A very frustrated wife buys a pair of crutchless knickers in an attempt to spice up her dead sex-life. She puts them on, together with a short skirt and sits on the lounge opposite her husband. At strategic moments she crosses and uncrosses her legs enough times till her husband says. "Are you wearing crutchless knickers?"
Yes, she answers with a seductive smile.
Thank Christ for that. I thought the stuffing was coming out of the sofa.
Nobody should ever have to suffer this again...
Thursday, 21 May 2009
It's true...It's more bollocks
Don't laugh at this! Just do it!
I've done this 3 different times and every time within a hour my wish comes true!!! & My best friend did this and wished for a promotion and she got the call this morning and she got a promotion!!!
The last time I did this it worked for me too. I wished for a baby, and you all know what happened (approx. months later).
I had to give this a shot...
I'm So sorry about this, but I had to keep it going. The last time I sent this exact e-mail out, I got a new job and now I'm superstitious .
Start thinking something you really really want, 'cause this is astounding... the person that sent this to me said their wish came true 10 mins after they read the mail so I thought 'what the heck'. '
**
******
*******
******
******
**********
( , )( , )
^
*.....*
YOU HAVE JUST BEEN VISITED BY DR. Seuss ' S
'CAT IN THE HAT'.
He will grant you one wish.
MAKE YOUR WISH WHEN THE COUNT DOWN IS OVER.
10
9
8
7
6
5
4
3
2
1
0
~~~~~~~
MAKE A WISH!!!!!
~~~~~~~~~
~~~~~~~~
~~~~~~~
~~~~~~
~~~~~
~~~~
~~~
~~
~
~~
~~~
~~~~
~~~~~
~~~~~~
~~~~~~~
~~~~~~~~
~~~~~~~~~
NOW SEND THIS TO 10 PEOPLE WITHIN THE HOUR OF READING THIS.
IF YOU DON'T, YOUR WISH WILL BECOME THE OPPOSITE!
I've done this 3 different times and every time within a hour my wish comes true!!! & My best friend did this and wished for a promotion and she got the call this morning and she got a promotion!!!
The last time I did this it worked for me too. I wished for a baby, and you all know what happened (approx. months later).
I had to give this a shot...
I'm So sorry about this, but I had to keep it going. The last time I sent this exact e-mail out, I got a new job and now I'm superstitious .
Start thinking something you really really want, 'cause this is astounding... the person that sent this to me said their wish came true 10 mins after they read the mail so I thought 'what the heck'. '
**
******
*******
******
******
**********
( , )( , )
^
*.....*
YOU HAVE JUST BEEN VISITED BY DR. Seuss ' S
'CAT IN THE HAT'.
He will grant you one wish.
MAKE YOUR WISH WHEN THE COUNT DOWN IS OVER.
10
9
8
7
6
5
4
3
2
1
0
~~~~~~~
MAKE A WISH!!!!!
~~~~~~~~~
~~~~~~~~
~~~~~~~
~~~~~~
~~~~~
~~~~
~~~
~~
~
~~
~~~
~~~~
~~~~~
~~~~~~
~~~~~~~
~~~~~~~~
~~~~~~~~~
NOW SEND THIS TO 10 PEOPLE WITHIN THE HOUR OF READING THIS.
IF YOU DON'T, YOUR WISH WILL BECOME THE OPPOSITE!
Wednesday, 25 February 2009
10 years old, this makes for a great vintage fire drill
Yes 10 years old and over 40,000 round trips of the internet. Finally it lands in the lap of the fire drill. Hopefully never to annoy or clog up an inbox ever again.
Thursday, 19 February 2009
The Black Bra - actually funny
I had lunch with 2 of my unmarried friends. One is engaged, one is a mistress and of course I have been married for 20+ years.
We were chatting about our relationships and decided to amaze our men by wearing a black leather bra, stiletto heels and a mask over our eyes We agreed to meet in a few days to exchange notes. Here's how it all went.
My engaged friend:
The other night my boyfriend came over and found me with a black leather bodice, tall stilettos and a mask. He saw me and said, 'You are the woman of my dreams. I love you. Then we made love all night long.
The mistress:
Me too! The other night I met my lover at his office and I was wearing the leather bodice, heels and mask over my eyes and a raincoat. When I opened the raincoat he didn't say a word, but we had wild sex all night.
Then I had to share my story:
When my husband came home I was wearing the leather bodice, black stockings, stilettos and a mask over my eyes. As soon as he came in the door and saw me he said,
"What's for dinner, Batman?"
We were chatting about our relationships and decided to amaze our men by wearing a black leather bra, stiletto heels and a mask over our eyes We agreed to meet in a few days to exchange notes. Here's how it all went.
My engaged friend:
The other night my boyfriend came over and found me with a black leather bodice, tall stilettos and a mask. He saw me and said, 'You are the woman of my dreams. I love you. Then we made love all night long.
The mistress:
Me too! The other night I met my lover at his office and I was wearing the leather bodice, heels and mask over my eyes and a raincoat. When I opened the raincoat he didn't say a word, but we had wild sex all night.
Then I had to share my story:
When my husband came home I was wearing the leather bodice, black stockings, stilettos and a mask over my eyes. As soon as he came in the door and saw me he said,
"What's for dinner, Batman?"
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